Continuing in our series to stop the self-entitled mentality: New Year’s Resolutions for Kids., we arrive at Resolution 6.
6) I won’t quit something I like doing because I am not the best. (For example, girls who don’t win the top awards are prone to give up hobbies they like, like painting, swimming, gymnastics, music because they feel they failed if they weren’t first.) Kids quit too often because they didn’t win.
Only one child can be best. Only one person is boss. Does that mean we all quit or give up? So many kids do. So many kids will give up painting or the piano because they didn’t get the top reward. If they quit, they are the real losers. Kids who quit because they aren’t No 1 turn into kids who won’t take entry level jobs. Or kids who feel down whenever they don’t win.
My niece’s local soccer league doesn’t keep score so kids don’t feel bad if they lose. But the kids still kept score in their heads. They knew who won and who didn’t. Kids need to have goals. Achievement is important but winning isn’t everything. Doing your best is and enjoying the experience.
Sometimes you need to know if you are doing well. Sometimes you just need to enjoy yourself.
For more information on building realistic self-esteem and conquering the self-entitled mentality, check out Parent Cue Cards sets for Chores, Kindergarten Essentials, etc at Amazon. And I am featured in the upcoming issues of PARENTING magazine (March 2012) about the positives and negatives of being a helicopter parent.
“Mommy, what was your New Year’s Resolution?” Kids want to know what parents are trying to solve for the New Year. They will help us parents with our resolutions but do your children have any resolutions of their own, besides doing homework and whining less?
These are great resolutions but tackling the self-esteem mentality will set your children up for life as much as tackling the homework.
It starts with the child who expects a reward for every trip to the grocery store then extends to an iPhone as a reward for the ordinary book report and ends with college graduates refusing to take an entry level job, expecting to start as a manager or executive.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Christie Barnes, author of THE PARANOID PARENTS GUIDE, is the mother of triplet 9-yr-olds plus a tween daughter. She is the founder of Paranoid Parents, dedicated to stop parents worrying about the wrong things. Her blog, website, Paranoid Parents Anonymous club, and a dozen successful mini-books are helping parents with a “parent worry” extreme make-over and helping kids with a “self-esteem” make-over. http://www.paranoidparentsguide.com
Barnes is featured in the upcoming March 2012 Parenting Magazine (both editions). She has appeared recently on ABC News Now. Good Morning America parenting expert Annie Pleshette Murphy said “I love this smart book.” This book was featured in the Sunday New York Times; was the ‘hit’ of NPR, the Chicago Tribune, the LA Times and radio and television across the country.
Kids repeat after me:
CBarnes 
As author of the Paranoid Parents Guide, I am often asked by parents how to stop this new self-entitled mentality so many kids have. Some kids, even my own kids, seem to think every day is Christmas and they are entitled to a present every time they do something good. So I started this series of tips to follow throughout the year.
